


never ready

by ofthecloudsjpeg



Category: Avengers: Endgame - Fandom, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Gen, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Peter being sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-02
Updated: 2019-05-02
Packaged: 2020-02-15 23:39:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18679645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ofthecloudsjpeg/pseuds/ofthecloudsjpeg
Summary: Peter wasn’t ready.He wasn’t ready for Tony to be gone.But it happened.OR the one in which Peter Parker meets Morgan Stark





	never ready

Peter wasn’t ready.

He wasn’t ready for him to be gone.

But it happened.

He wasn’t ready for a lot of things, in fact. He wasn’t ready to face Ned again, in fear that the emotional exhaustion would finally get to him. He wasn’t ready to talk to Pepper after the funeral service, for more or less the same reason. He wasn’t ready to face the women who had saved him during the fight because he had been too _weak._  He wasn’t ready to acknowledge the wizard, who knew of Tony’s future and _didn’t say anything_. He was barely ready to talk to his Aunt May again, even though all he wanted was a hug after the fight. He wasn’t ready to meet Morgan Stark, Tony’s daughter.

Jesus.

Tony had a _daughter_.

He didn’t have a daughter 24 hours ago, for Peter. He wasn’t married to Pepper 24 hours ago. He didn’t wield the Iron Gauntlet 24 hours ago. He didn’t save everyone in the entire universe 24 hours ago.

He was here 24 hours ago.

He was alive 24 hours ago.

But now, he’s gone.

Forever.

-

Peter wasn’t ready for a lot of things. But above all else, he wasn’t ready to say goodbye.

-

He never got to see Tony and Pepper get married.

He was gone for five years. He should’ve noticed that there were some things that happened, but he didn’t. Until it all came crashing down on him.

He sees the ring on Pepper’s finger, and call him her husband, but he wasn’t there for that. He wasn’t there to be a groomsmen like Tony asked him to. He didn’t get to see their first dance, and he didn’t get to see him be ridiculously in love with Pepper on that special night.

It’s ridiculously unfair.

He didn’t get to hear their pregnancy announcement. He didn’t get to see little baby Morgan open her eyes for the first time, or even take her to his first decathlon meet. He didn’t get to gush over how much she looked like Tony, and he didn’t get to see her or support her in any way. He didn’t get to see her run around in the front yard with the best dad in the world and have the time of her life.

He never got to be her big brother.

He knows it’s far fetched. He doesn’t even know if Tony even liked him all that much. Maybe he felt guilty all this time, and that’s why he gave Peter the suit. Who knows if he wanted Peter in Morgan’s life or not?

(That’s bullshit. Even Peter knows that isn’t true. But he can’t help but to feel that way. And besides, Tony’s not here to tell him if he’s right or wrong, is he?)

-

It’s an hour after the funeral, and he’s sitting on the edge of the dock, listening to the water pour out of a nearby creek.

He’s blissfully, and peacefully alone.

After a few minutes of staring blankly into the water, he hears tiny footsteps rapidly getting closer and closer to him. He doesn’t care to look back, his mind too far from this reality to acknowledge anyone’s presence.

Ah, but this wasn’t just _anyone_.

Morgan Stark took a shaky seat next to Peter, eating a Cheeto and breathing heavily.

Peter looked at her hesitantly, “Hello.”

Morgan smiled at him, open mouthed and everything (still catching her breath), and mimicked him back, “Hello!” She cocked her head at him, “Why’re you crying?”

Peter sniffled, surprised both at the question and the fact that he was crying. He didn’t even register it. “I’m uh, just… really sad right now, that’s all.”

Morgan looks at the handful of Cheetos in her hand and back up at him. She smiles shyly, and holds out a puff out at him, “Here you go. Daddy says that food makes anyone feel better. Except Mommy, ‘cause she’s a robot!”

Morgan’s giggles brings him out of his gloomy state of mind. He laughs softly, knowing that Tony was the probably one to call Pepper a robot in the first place, and his head hurts with the reality that this little girl _was so much like her father._ He can’t quite explain it, but in this fifteen seconds of interaction, he realizes how badly she reminds Peter of Tony.

He also understands that she doesn’t understand Tony’s situation exactly. Pepper has probably tried to explain (she wasn’t the one to hold truths from her daughter), but a four-year old has a hard time comprehending death. Even the ones that come from geniuses.

He takes the Cheeto. He gently places it to his side, trying not to draw too much attention to the fact that he doesn't eat it. “Thank you, you're very sweet. I’m Peter,” he holds out his other hand for her to shake.

Morgan’s eyes grow wide, and she gasps softly, “ _You're_ Peter?”

“Uh, yeah, yes I am. Why? Do you know m--,” Peter gets cut off by Morgans tiny body being flung at him at a, if he didn’t know better, inhumanly speed.

Morgan giggles, “You’re my Daddy’s kid!”

Peter freezes, his hands in the air as Morgan clutches at him, “I-- What?!”

She huffs and releases Peter from her grasp, but stays on his lap. “You’re my dad’s kid,” she states like it’s obvious, “He always goes, ‘That kid used to love building things with me.’ We usually only play with blocks, but he says that you built real things, like refrigerators ‘nd stuff.”

Morgan looks over at the lake again instead of Peter, and starts rambling, “When I asked who you are once, he said that you’re his kid and that’s it. He said that you weren’t with us anymore, but you will be soon. He’s like a mind reader or something ‘cause he got it _right_! I believe that. That my Daddy is a mind reader, ‘cause my Daddy’s awesome. Mommy says that he went away for a while, and he’s not going to be back. She says that “he’s not with us” like he said about you. That makes me sad a lot,” Morgan’s smile falters slightly, but jumps right back on her face. “But I think he’ll be back though! ‘Cause he loves me and Mommy three thousand and more, probably. And I know that he loves you, and I know that he would want me to be friends with you ‘cause you’re brave and funny. That’s what Daddy said too.”

Peter takes a huge, shaky breath. He didn’t breath for the entirety of her monologue, not wanting to miss anything that she said. His lungs burn for the need of air, and his eyes threaten to unleash the waterfall of tears he’s been building up. He tries to hold back the sob that wants to rip through him, but he’s afraid he’ll scare Morgan if he does so, so he doesn’t.

Morgan, unaware of what her words were doing to Peter’s emotional state, jumps up and squeals, “Peter! I was here to come and get you for lunch! Harls said to get you and come back, so let’s go! And we don’t want to make Harls mad, _trust me_.” She whispers the last part like she knows something Peter doesn’t, and it reminds him of Tony _so goddamned much_  his chest hurts.

“You can go first, Morgan, I’ll catch up in a minute,” Peter says, trying to buy himself some time to calm himself down. Morgan chirps an, “Okay!” and heads off to the house once more.

Peter scrubs his face and takes deep breaths.

Tony had talked about him to Morgan.

_Tony talked to Morgan about Peter._

And she remembered. She remembered that Tony told her that Peter liked building stuff, and that he was funny.

Peter meant something to Tony, so much so that he told his daughter about him.

Peter lets out an exhale far too loud to be considered normal, and tries to think of something else to take his mind off of Tony. If he keeps thinking about Tony and Morgan any longer, he’s going to start sobbing, alone, by a lake.

“Peter!” He hears a high pitched yell come from behind him. He stands up quickly, turns around and there she is, Her Royal Highness Morgan Stark screaming across the dock. “Come on, the adults are eating all of the chocolate! We can’t let them get away with this!”

From behind her, he sees a very tall, blond man (Harls?) grab her from behind, and start tickling her, “You’ll never get us! We will be victorious in our endeavor to steal and eat all of the chocolate in the land! Muahaha!”

Morgan’s screams of delight and laughter could be heard from miles away, and Peter can’t help but to smile.

“Harley, put me down! Peter save me! Save me, Spider-man!”

Peter didn’t even register his superhero name being called as he laughs and runs towards them. He grabs Morgan from this adults tickle-happy fingers and dramatically exclaims, “I’ll save you from the wicked villains, Princess Morgan!” He carries her bridal style and jogs into the home, with her giggling the whole way, with his face having a genuine grin upon it, and with Harley’s gaze soft behind them.

-

Peter wasn’t ready for a lot of things. He wasn’t ready to see his Aunt May and bring her more turmoil. He wasn’t ready to go back to school and face his teachers and classmates. He will probably never be ready to say goodbye to Tony.

And he wasn’t ready to meet Morgan Stark. But Morgan Stark was more than ready to meet him.

And that’s enough for now.

**Author's Note:**

> \- jesus fuck i'm late to the party but here i am  
> \- i made Morgan be a little more outgoing and toddler-ish in this because toddlers Do Not shut the fuck up. something we have in common i suppose. anyways, she had like 8 lines so i'm not tagging this as out of character hhhhhhhhhh  
> \- sad boy hours for Peter are ON  
> \- i hope this is good in the morning  
> \- and i hope you enjoyed :-) please consider leaving a comment <33 thank you for reading!!


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